11 Relationship Boundaries Indian Culture Needs to Normalize
3. Clear Boundaries with Extended Family

Extended families can offer care and community, but they can also blur lines around decision-making. Who gets a say in wedding plans, living arrangements, or career moves? Establishing micro-boundaries keeps relationships respectful without shutting people out. Start by mapping the choices that need privacy: finances, bedroom routines, and partner complaints. Communicate small rules: “Please don’t call us after 10 pm,” or “We’ll tell you about major decisions before they happen.” If family elders expect immediate updates, negotiate a compromise: schedule a weekly check-in instead of constant messages. Therapists who work with South Asian families suggest phrasing boundaries as care-based requests: “We want your blessing, and we also need room to decide.” That language preserves respect while asserting autonomy. Gradual changes work best—introduce one boundary at a time and follow up with consistent behavior. If relatives cross a line, respond calmly and restate the limit. Repair the relationship when needed, but hold the boundary steady. Over time, families learn that limits make the home more peaceful, not colder.
